Sunday, September 22, 2013

HOLY COW THIS IS THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD.

but honestly, i love the MTC soooo much. i don't even know where to begin? 
I was escorted to my room by this really nice sister who's going to korea and GRUNDVIG SHIMAI IS IN MY DISTRICT AND IN MY ROOM!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS LIFE?!?!?! besides learning japanese, not calling Grundvig Shimai "Ariana" is the HARDEST thing in the MTC. hahahah but actually. I don't know how many times I've called her ari in the last couple of days, but it's been a ton. she's not my comp, but VIOLETTE SHIMAI (that mitch met at BYU and told me to look out for) IS. she's wayyyyyyyyyyyy cool and i absolutely love her with all my heart. She's 6'1" so she sticks out/will stick out a lot. and she's drop dead gorgeous. And just super nice and sweet and radiates with the spirit. the choro tachi (elders) drool all over her. She's 21! and went to Jerusalem this past summer so that's probably the most legit thing ever. 

BUT ARIANA IS IN MY ROOOOOOM! and her comp is kendall shimai and she's the kindest, sweetest person i know in my whole life. and she offered everything she has to all of us. She grew up in a japanese speaking home sooo i'm slightly jealous. actually, about half of my district did. (or just studied japanese in high school) so that's been both a blessing and also humbling. One of the biggest things that i need to remember as i'm here is how fresh i am to speaking japanese so i can't be too hard on myself. we taught our first lesson in japanese yesterday?? sooo. that was definitely an interesting experience. My comp. missed a lot of class because she's in the woman's chorus that will sing in the relief society general broadcast  and she doesn't know any japanese so i did about 94% of the speaking. which is interesting cause i'd only known how to say some sentences in japanese for about 20 hours of class. IT WAS SO DIFFICULT. there were so many things that I wanted to say and i felt sooo restricted and it was really challenging. i could definitely feel the spirit, but there were times when super heavy doubts popped into my head as i was trying to translate a english-structured sentence into a backwards japanese-structured sentence and i'm pretty sure i threw some spanish structure in there, and i thought a couple times that I wasn't assigned the correct mission because everything that i was trying to remember kept coming to me in spanish, but i just had to keep reminding myself that I was called by God to serve in Kobe and that He knows that I have the capability to do this, otherwise He wouldn't have called me here. It's super humbling which is really good for me. ALSO, one of the branch presidency members here that I have was the mission president in Sapporo, Japan (DAD) and his last name is DANIELS. AND HE HAS A DAUGHTER NAMED MEGAN HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN THIS WORLD IS CRAZY. so that was fun discovering. I love him-- he's so helpful. I had an interview with him and he just built my confidence a ton. I expressed my baby concern for learning japanese and he just told me that this experience will humble me so that I can be more receptive to the Spirit, which is crucial for teaching. Really that's all that teaches. we are just the communicators. 
I LOVE THIS PLACE SO MUCH. we've had so many wonderful spiritual experiences and i just want to stay here forever. You always hear about how the MTC's teachers speak the language on the first day, right? Well i thought, "nahhh, this is the lowest level of japanese that they can teach-- surely our teacher will speak english to us?? at least a little bit?" i've never been more wrong. so that was good. ii desu ne. She has not spoken a word of english to us. but she is the SWEETEST. she gave me the biggest hug and just smiles at me and makes me believe i can actually do this hahahahhahahahahaa. but she sounds really awesome so that's motivating. I can't wait until i'm fluent. or until i can understand her hahahhaha. after yesterday afternoon i can probably understand 40% of what she says? maybe that's a little high. but things are looking up!!!! sometimes i just laugh. but I know the Lord will help me.

Iesu Kirisuto wa watashi o ai shite imasu. Kare wa kanzen desu. To Iesu Kirisuto wa watashi o tasukemasu to shitte imasu. Iesu Kirisuto no mina ni yotte o-inori shimasu, amen." maybe that's right. It's supposed to say "Jesus loves me. He is perfect. And I believe that Jesus Christ will help me. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen."  

hopefully next week i'll be able to use legit sentence structure and a few more vocab words. (;


I miss you all!!! I love you all! I'm still working on letters. 

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Farewell Talk: Trusting In God

おはようございます, Brothers and Sisters! I am grateful to be here with all of you today, and I’m excited for this opportunity to share with you my testimony of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and also describe some of my experiences and thoughts that have been preparing and inspiring me as I anticipate my upcoming mission to Kobe, Japan.

Almost 200 years ago, a fourteen year-old boy by the name of Joseph Smith lived with his family in Palmyra, New York, in one of the only countries in the world to practice the freedom of religion. This right was capitalized, and many churches were formed in his city, just as thousands of churches exist in our country today. Joseph was deeply religious so he naturally sought after which church he should join. Confused by the differences in doctrine, he searched the scriptures for an answer and was impacted by the verse James 1:5, which says, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” Trusting that God would enlighten him, as the scripture promised, he decided to ask God what he should do.
            
Joseph went to a grove near his house and offered a prayer to Heavenly Father. In his own words, he recounts the experience: “I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me… When the light rested upon me I saw two Personages, whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—‘This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!’” In that meeting with both Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, they informed Joseph that none of the churches on the earth at that moment had the fullness of the gospel of Jesus Christ, and that he would be their servant in restoring the gospel to the world. Through this young, teenage boy, the priesthood, or authority and power that God gives to man for the salvation of mankind, was reestablished, thus giving him the heavenly ordained authority to baptize in the name of Jesus Christ, and organize His church. Not only was Joseph Smith trusted with this immense responsibility, he was also commanded to translate the Book of Mormon to make it accessible to each of us today, as well as being entrusted to receive revelations of many other lost doctrines for the salvation of mankind, such as the Plan of Salvation, temple ordinances, the ability to be sealed to our families for eternity, the true nature of God, etc. Imagine the inadequacy Joseph must have felt. These things were not all restored at once, but were entrusted to, largely, this ONE boy. To do any of this by his imperfect, limited, mortal self was absolutely impossible—trusting in God was imperative and literally the only way. Thus, because he trusted in God, he was, in turn, strengthened and qualified to accomplish the Lord’s plan; which he did until he died.

Truly “by small in simple things are great things brought to pass,” as stated in Alma 37:6. What is simpler than a farm boy, and what is greater than God’s plan for the salvation of mankind? A Prophet and President of this Church, Gordon B. Hinckley, once said, “The work of the Lord is done by ordinary people who work in an extraordinary way. The Lord magnifies those who put forth the effort… with small means the Lord accomplishes his marvelous work.”

After remembering all of this, I can’t even justify feeling scared for my own mission to serve the people of Japan. I am just a microscopic part of this world today, but I know that the Lord will have great things in store for me if I accept His help to reach my personal potential. I figured that just as the Lord has strengthened many of His children in their weaknesses to accomplish His purposes, He will strengthen me in mine, particularly if I am diligent and prepared. No, I definitely don’t have a perfect trust, and yes, sometimes I’m really anxious—I’ll be in a big city FILLED with people whom I probably won’t be able to understand or communicate with for some time, away from the comforts of my family and the American culture that I am accustomed to. But the Creator of this universe called me to this work and won’t make me go alone—something that I’ve already been blessed to see.

He already has provided me with countless tender mercies before I’ve even left. My father served his mission in a different area of Japan and has been helping me learn Japanese phrases, sharing with me his Japanese experiences, favorite oriental recipes, and missionary photo albums. Another one of my best friends, Grundvig Shimai, along with five other people in my freshman BYU ward are serving in the same mission, many of us reporting to the MTC on the same day. My brother, Mitchell, returned from his mission this summer and shared with me some of his precious missionary experiences, helped me study Preach My Gospel, but most importantly prepared me emotionally to embark on this journey. And, about halfway through my freshman year at BYU, right as I began to fill out my mission papers, I was diagnosed with tension headaches and migraines.

You’re probably thinking, “No, Meg. Migraines are NOT tender mercies.” And I agree—they’re quite bothersome and mine often come with stress, which tends to stress me out more because of the poor timing. But the timing of the onset of my migraines definitely was a tender mercy. Back in Provo a doctor prescribed me with medicine that I should be taking everyday to decrease my headaches, and it’s the foulest thing I’ve ever tasted in my life. However, because I knew that I was serving a mission, I was able to choose between a stronger pill that would restrict my ability to serve a mission, or a less potent pill, which is legal in significantly more countries. I didn’t know where I was going to be, so I took the less potent pill, and I’m grateful that I did… as apparently someone needs me in Japan.

I obviously haven’t served a mission, but from what I’ve heard, it can often be stressful because of the meticulously planned days full of studying, experiencing culture shock once out in the field, and being rejected, etc. Since I started getting migraines before I arrived on my mission, I was able to find ways to subdue the pain to allow me to focus—a task that would’ve been significantly more difficult in Japan as it would distract from my purpose, and I probably wouldn’t understand what my options were as clearly as when I learned them in America and my parents were one phone call away to help me. Although I still need to endure this problem, I trust that Heavenly Father is keeping watch over me, and maximizing my opportunities to serve when I will finally be a missionary in Japan. When I first started getting migraines everyday, I vividly remember thinking that the timing was awful, as it was during the first week of mid-terms in the Winter semester. Fast-forward seven months, I can now see some benefits of the Lord’s timing with this affliction.

Most of the time, we do not have the opportunity to understand why the Lord is allowing something that we perceive as something less-than-wonderful to happen to us, so in every case we need to just simply invest our faith and trust. Oh! And there’s something I forgot… just a little bit of pixie dust. (ahhh so corny. my apologies.) Which in this analogy could be obedience. But really, Disney does make a valid point that as we endure whatever test we are given, we need to have faith and trust and “think of the happiest things.” If we don’t have a positive attitude, I’m not sure how much Heavenly Father will want to bless us. In Peter Pan, thinking of the happiest thing is crucial to their ability to fly off to Neverland. 

Both Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ do love us and want us to be happy. We feel their love when we feel the Holy Ghost comforting us. But the Holy Ghost does more than comforts: it also testifies of truths, can bring all things to our remembrance, and stands as a guide both from mortal peril, and back home to God the Father.

As missionaries, we are not the ones converting—that is the task of the Holy Ghost. In an email from a missionary friend I was reminded that, “Without Him, there would be no use in trying, because at the end of the day, every true conversion has absolutely nothing to do with the missionaries who are teaching. It's between God and His children. We simply try to remove the roadblocks and give them the tools they need to get closer to Him.” Every one has the light of Christ, and when the truth is spoken, the Holy Ghost will testify to that light that whatever is being taught is right. It will help us remember truths about the gospel of Jesus Christ taught to our spirits long ago in the pre-mortal life, and guide and direct us to help us make the right decisions and avoid temptation, so that we can return to our Father in Heaven.

One of my favorite scriptures in the whole world is given in Proverbs 3:5-6, which says, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.”  

Sometimes I like to think that I know what’s best for myself, but that’s certainly not true. I am one teeny tiny speck in Heavenly Father’s grand plan-- He knows absolutely everything. He has an individual plan for each of us-- all fitting perfectly together in His Master plan. He knows my thoughts, feelings, desires, strengths, weaknesses, inclinations inside and out, and how they could mesh with another person’s thoughts, strengths, weaknesses, inclinations, to perhaps strengthen him or me or both of us. Or a third person! He knows what is best for each of us and all of us—and His plan is able to satisfy both. He will help us reach our full potential, and His desire for us is that we become our very best. As one of my best friends- the missionary Elder Montgomery- once told me, “life isn’t about being—it’s about becoming.” If Heavenly Father knows that through a certain trial we can develop a Christ-like characteristic we need, He will allow us to struggle through it, and will be there for us if we let Him. All we need to do is trust in Him, and trust in His purposes and His timing. God is our loving Father in Heaven and wouldn’t advise us to do something that won’t be beneficial, whether now or in the future. We were put on this earth to be tested and to learn and grow and repent and prepare to meet God, where we will be judged of Him, and hopefully return to live with Him again if we are righteous and worthy.

Many things we cannot do by ourselves and we must place our trust in God that HE will help us, just as Joseph Smith did. If you trust in Him, He will endow you with His power to accomplish whatever it is that you need to do. You cannot be perfect, but you can give it your personal best and that’s all you need, and all Heavenly Father asks. He will fill in the rest where you fall short. Where my brain won’t be able to process all of the sentence structures and verb tenses and vocabulary words in Japanese at one time, He will help me understand, and I will need to trust Him. If we are praying for opportunities to share the restored gospel of Jesus Christ, He will help us and inspire us with names, and we will need to trust Him. Perhaps the most vital key to establishing trust with Heavenly Father is sincerity. If I sincerely want to teach someone in another language, I will need to prepare and do all that I can before He will step in. If we want to spread the gospel, we need to be sincere in our desires. Elder Henry B. Eyring once said, “You show your trust in Him when you listen with the intent to learn and repent and then you go and do whatever He asks. If you trust God enough to listen for His message… you will find it. And if you then go and do what He would have you do, your power to trust Him will grow, and in time you will be overwhelmed with gratitude to find that He has come to trust you.” Likewise, when we refuse to go and do what the Lord has asked, His trust in us will diminish. The two correlate: if you want to gain trust in our Lord, do what He commands. Always remember Him, take upon His name, and keep His commandments: He will entrust us with His Spirit. Once we sin or disobey, the Spirit will depart from us until we have become obedient again.

This is the message of the scriptures—we see this sprinkled in the New Testament, and smothered in the stories of the House of Israel and the Nephite, Lamanite, and Jaredite nations. If we do all that we can to keep the Lord’s commandments we will be prospered, if we don’t, we’ll be cut off from His presence. Wouldn’t it be easier to watch ourselves, remember this promise the Lord has made, and do our best to keep His commandments? I guarantee greater blessings will come from this than anything else.

Possibly the greatest instance of the Lord’s mercy when we fall short is that of the Atonement. No one on this earth is perfect—Jesus Christ was, is, and will be the only one to ever achieve that standard. Since nothing unholy can enter the kingdom of God, we would all be doomed. Only Christ would dwell there with God the Father. But because Heavenly Father loves us and wants us to return to Him, He sent His Son to overcome death and pay for our sins so that through Him, we can be cleansed. Only when we repent can we take advantage of what He suffered for us, we can capitalize on this potential to be cleansed and return to live with God—otherwise we will be left to the pain and agony and sufferings for our own sins. But, again, we must do all that we can to repent so that Christ’s sufferings can cleanse us. We must trust that His Atonement is real and that God will remember our sins no more—we become clean, and we will definitely sin again. But He will pick up where our mortal selves fall short.

Trust in the Lord. God will not remove our trials, but He will support us in them. In every instance where I’ve been afraid or nervous or uneasy, and I have prayed to my Father in Heaven for comfort, He has granted it to me. This comfort has come in small little whispers of confidence, and waves of serenity. Some may call my trust in God wishful thinking or some sort of psychological coping mechanism to help me overcome my fears—to give myself an imagined hope. However, I KNOW that the peace I feel when I pray is not from myself, but from God alone. I know that He loves me and wants me to learn and grow and succeed. I know that He will bless me with what He, in His wisdom, knows what I will need.

I know that President Monson is the prophet of the Lord today. I know that the Lord directs us through our prophet because He loves us. I know that the fullness of Christ's gospel is on the earth today and within The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I know that Christ does love us as well and that He sacrificed His entire life so that we could inherit eternal life with our Father in Heaven. 

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Test Run

I have finally accepted another aspect of Mormon woman culture: making a blog!! hahah wooohooo! But I have a legitimate excuse!!! Exactly 2 weeks from today, I will be arriving at the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah, where I'll be studying to represent my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ for the next 18 months. For 9 weeks I will be learning Japanese and how to teach the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the wonderful people in Kobe, Japan. In November of 2013 with a Japanese-English dictionary in hand and never-ending prayers in my heart, I'll step foot onto Japanese soil where I'll be living for the following 16 months, preaching and teaching, but mostly growing.

Haaaaaa this is so weird. I give my farewell talk in church this Sunday!!! I'll post it on here once I've given it. Time has sped by SOOO quickly and half of me wants it to freeze, but the other half of me wants to embrace it! I CANNOT WAIT TO GO TO PROVO AND THEN TO JAPAN!!! hahaha but I will definitely miss my family and friends in my mitten state and in America. I still need to pack a few things and get some legal and medical things done.

Here's a taste of the stuff I'll need to bring with me on this adventure for the next 18 months:

-driver's license
-passport (mine's supposedly somewhere in Provo. otherwise this might be a very short trip)
-visa (in progress)
-current temple recommend
-scriptures in english
-journal, pens, pencils, notebooks, envelopes, millions of stickers (woo hoo! write me while I'm gone!)
-Church literature including True to the Faith, Jesus the Christ, Our Heritage, and Our Search for Happiness
-debit card-- make sure to contact the bank to let them know of my locations/dates, so they don't think you're scammin'
-flash drive in the shape of a cochlear surgeon action figure, thanks to Pops
-1 purple umbrella
-hangers for skirts, shirts, coat
-camera and charger
-2 hand, wash, and regular towels
-make-up, 3 big tubes of toothpaste (apparently Japan doesn't have quality toothpaste?)
-3 sticks of old spice sweat defense pure sport. men's deodorant works 10000000% better. and just smells heavenly.
-lots and lots of women products bahahah
-shoe insoles
-3 razors
-hello kitty band-aids. let the obsession begin
-a gigantic bottle of multi-vitamins, dayquil and nyquil, sudafed, claritin, pepto bismol, anti-itch cream, anti-biotic ointment, looooads of excedrin, cough drops, anti-fungal cream (cross your fingers we won't have to use this), icy hot, as many migraine meds as possible, the biggest bottle of advil imaginable
-4 toothbrushes, 5 floss packets
-6+ chapsticks
-side bag, although I hear Japan has really good missionary bags, so we'll see how this one compares
-passport holder
-pencil/pen holder with pictures of my little brother smothering it, courtesy of said little brother
-guatemalan pouch my brother gave me from his mission
-watches/earrings/necklaces
-Japanese fan-- just preppin.
-personal chopsticks-- more prep
-missionary white handbook
-framed "Living Christ"for the apartment
-lots and lots of quotes from church and my Dad that'll hang in my apartment
-dino silly bands, mike wazaoski bracelet
-shampooo/conditioner, face wash, lotion, shaving cream
-comb, q-tips, nail polish
-sewing kit
-alarm clock
-laundry bag
-small flashlight
-batteries
-undies, slips, spandex shorts for biking in skirts all day, every day
-1 pair of jeans, 3 t-shirts
-1 pair of gym shoes
-outfits (8-10), warm and cold
-3 shoes that are polishable, sturdy, good arch support, slip-ons, and water resistant. good luck!
-rain boots
-warm tights for 2 winters
-2 capri-length pants for working out, 1 pair of long pants for working out, 1 sweatshirt
-socks
-winter coat with zip-out liner and breathable
-gloves and hat that are waterproof and warm
-about 4 sweaters/cardigans
-p.j.'s and slippers and robe
-shower sandals
-ipod with no internet connection, full of inspiring songs
-Preach My Gospel
-temple clothes

hahaha I'm sure I'm forgetting a few things in there, but I'd say that's a solid list? It all needs to fit into 2 suitcases, each needing to weigh less than 50 pounds. So that's good.

Ōku no ai, (much love)
ダニエルしまい (Danieru Shimai) ((Sister Daniels))